Comments on: Tough Times Even With Gay Siblings http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/tough-times-even-with-gay-siblings Help For Parents Of Gay Children Tue, 24 Apr 2012 17:36:49 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Donna http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/tough-times-even-with-gay-siblings/comment-page-1#comment-76621 Donna Tue, 06 Mar 2012 02:18:53 +0000 http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/?p=33#comment-76621 Linda and Millie...I am a mother of 3 children...my daughter (24 years old) came out to my husband and I 2 years ago and told us...last week my youngest son (20 years old)came and told us he is gay. It was not easy when my daughter came to us 2 years ago...lots of prayers and sole searching...and now I find out that my youngest son is too. I have been kinda depressed since he came out last week...but I told him I love him very much and was so proud of him for coming out...he said he fills so much better knowing that we still love him and just want him to be happy...he has seen how we have excepted his sister and love her and a good relationship with her and her friend...so I think it made it easier for him to come to my husband and I. I think I have always known that my daughter was gay...and suspected my son might be too...but thought there was now way I could have 2 gay children...Last week when I was at work (I am a hairstylist) I shared with one of my clients(who has a gay child) that my son came out and told us he was gay...so i have 2 gay children....she turned and looked up and me and said "you and your husband must be very special people...for God to bless you with two gay children...he knows that you and your husband will accept them for who they are and not shun them...how wonderful is that." After she said that I have decided to look at this in a whole different way....I think she is right...I should feel blessed...they are healthy, and good kids...they have alot of friends...who support them...I am not going to lie...I still have selfish thoughts like...what will people think when they find out I have 2 gay children...But I think in time I will get over that feeling...It has only been a week since he came out...Oh..I have a son that is 22 and he has a girlfriend ( 3 years ) ...I love him just as much as my other two...I am so glad I found this site...I find that reading your stories is very helpful in my journey!!! Linda and Millie…I am a mother of 3 children…my daughter (24 years old) came out to my husband and I 2 years ago and told us…last week my youngest son (20 years old)came and told us he is gay. It was not easy when my daughter came to us 2 years ago…lots of prayers and sole searching…and now I find out that my youngest son is too. I have been kinda depressed since he came out last week…but I told him I love him very much and was so proud of him for coming out…he said he fills so much better knowing that we still love him and just want him to be happy…he has seen how we have excepted his sister and love her and a good relationship with her and her friend…so I think it made it easier for him to come to my husband and I. I think I have always known that my daughter was gay…and suspected my son might be too…but thought there was now way I could have 2 gay children…Last week when I was at work (I am a hairstylist) I shared with one of my clients(who has a gay child) that my son came out and told us he was gay…so i have 2 gay children….she turned and looked up and me and said “you and your husband must be very special people…for God to bless you with two gay children…he knows that you and your husband will accept them for who they are and not shun them…how wonderful is that.” After she said that I have decided to look at this in a whole different way….I think she is right…I should feel blessed…they are healthy, and good kids…they have alot of friends…who support them…I am not going to lie…I still have selfish thoughts like…what will people think when they find out I have 2 gay children…But I think in time I will get over that feeling…It has only been a week since he came out…Oh..I have a son that is 22 and he has a girlfriend ( 3 years ) …I love him just as much as my other two…I am so glad I found this site…I find that reading your stories is very helpful in my journey!!!

]]> By: Dennis http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/tough-times-even-with-gay-siblings/comment-page-1#comment-9247 Dennis Sat, 28 Aug 2010 06:43:37 +0000 http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/?p=33#comment-9247 DAR there is help for people like you out there. PFLAG and others... I hope things are working out for you though. DAR there is help for people like you out there. PFLAG and others… I hope things are working out for you though.

]]> By: Millie http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/tough-times-even-with-gay-siblings/comment-page-1#comment-8679 Millie Sat, 14 Aug 2010 02:10:54 +0000 http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/?p=33#comment-8679 Dar..just read your blog...be strong...be there for your daughter & go to PFLAG meetings they do help. No one has the answer...it just is. Wish you all the best. Dar..just read your blog…be strong…be there for your daughter & go to PFLAG meetings they do help. No one has the answer…it just is. Wish you all the best.

]]> By: Millie http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/tough-times-even-with-gay-siblings/comment-page-1#comment-8678 Millie Sat, 14 Aug 2010 02:09:00 +0000 http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/?p=33#comment-8678 Linda I thought the same thing! Did not realize they are most like us then we think. I love my kids with all my heart & will always stand by there side. PFLAG does help!! Linda I thought the same thing! Did not realize they are most like us then we think. I love my kids with all my heart & will always stand by there side. PFLAG does help!!

]]> By: DAR http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/tough-times-even-with-gay-siblings/comment-page-1#comment-6317 DAR Sat, 15 May 2010 18:33:51 +0000 http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/?p=33#comment-6317 please help me ! my 18 yr. old daughter just came out to her dad and i,she lives with me but sees him on the weekends.i always thought of my self as a strong understanding person,but this has me knocked for a loop.my daughter was born with a very mild case of spina bifida, after 7 yrs of therapy she is able to walk but her balance isnt great,shes broken her right leg twice before she turned 17. shes been a cutter now for 8 yr. and now this ,i want to escape this nitemare but i know i cant. im alone with no family or friends to talk to.i want to be supportive of her but im at a breaking point.p.s. menopause isnt much of a help either im affraid. please help me ! my 18 yr. old daughter just came out to her dad and i,she lives with me but sees him on the weekends.i always thought of my self as a strong understanding person,but this has me knocked for a loop.my daughter was born with a very mild case of spina bifida, after 7 yrs of therapy she is able to walk but her balance isnt great,shes broken her right leg twice before she turned 17. shes been a cutter now for 8 yr. and now this ,i want to escape this nitemare but i know i cant. im alone with no family or friends to talk to.i want to be supportive of her but im at a breaking point.p.s. menopause isnt much of a help either im affraid.

]]> By: Linda http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/tough-times-even-with-gay-siblings/comment-page-1#comment-5155 Linda Tue, 09 Feb 2010 04:49:55 +0000 http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/?p=33#comment-5155 actually Millie I thought I was the only one!!LOL actually Millie I thought I was the only one!!LOL

]]> By: Linda http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/tough-times-even-with-gay-siblings/comment-page-1#comment-5144 Linda Mon, 08 Feb 2010 05:04:31 +0000 http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/?p=33#comment-5144 My daughter came out when she was 13, then 3 years later my son came out. I DO love my kids but struggle as well. I have actually had such comments as "TWO gay children!!! I didnt know that was POSSIBLE!" and "Wow, you must really wonder what you did wrong" How can people be so cruel. I am trying so hard to accept it myself, and I do accept my kids but wish society would be a little easier on us all. Any suggestions? Also,i response to the first poster.... I wish my kids were closer and would lean on each other more than they do. There is so much I don't understand. :( My daughter came out when she was 13, then 3 years later my son came out. I DO love my kids but struggle as well. I have actually had such comments as “TWO gay children!!! I didnt know that was POSSIBLE!” and “Wow, you must really wonder what you did wrong” How can people be so cruel. I am trying so hard to accept it myself, and I do accept my kids but wish society would be a little easier on us all. Any suggestions?

Also,i response to the first poster…. I wish my kids were closer and would lean on each other more than they do. There is so much I don’t understand. :(

]]> By: Millie http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/tough-times-even-with-gay-siblings/comment-page-1#comment-4872 Millie Thu, 14 Jan 2010 04:11:36 +0000 http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/?p=33#comment-4872 Hi my name is Millie, I have two sons, one is 21 & the other is 20. My oldest son is gay we found out when he was 14yrs & now I just found out that my 20 is gay also. Yes I am in shock & I feel numb. You would think that I would be able to handle this but it just seems harder for me. I love my sons more then anything in the world. I just feel shocked at this moment. And reading so many blogs & so many people having more then one gay child is amazing. I never realized it until now. I am planning on going to the PFLAG meeting where I live. I am praying that what I am feeling at this time will not last long. Hi my name is Millie, I have two sons, one is 21 & the other is 20. My oldest son is gay we found out when he was 14yrs & now I just found out that my 20 is gay also. Yes I am in shock & I feel numb. You would think that I would be able to handle this but it just seems harder for me. I love my sons more then anything in the world. I just feel shocked at this moment. And reading so many blogs & so many people having more then one gay child is amazing. I never realized it until now. I am planning on going to the PFLAG meeting where I live. I am praying that what I am feeling at this time will not last long.

]]> By: Dom http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/tough-times-even-with-gay-siblings/comment-page-1#comment-4798 Dom Fri, 08 Jan 2010 17:55:36 +0000 http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/?p=33#comment-4798 I understand the homophobia you are experiencing. My best advice to you is to move away from your family while still keeping in touch with them. This would help you understand and love yourself the more. You would also come to find peace within yourself. Dont hate your siblings. Love them still. They would understand someday. Remain calm and confident in yourself. Staying in a homophobic environment can be psychologically destructive to we gay people. Am gay too and have not told anyone yet. My coming out is going to be a difficult one though i dont plan to do so now. My country, Nigeria, is strongly homophobic. Dont hate yourself because Jesus Christ would never discriminate. The immense Love that God and Jesus Christ has for each of us is so indescribable that the human brain cannot apprehend. Also, several gay persons have died and come back to life and reported their near death experiences of meeting God and/or Jesus Christ who love them no matter what! (All creation inclusive). In fact the LOVE was so great that they didnt want to return. But they had to. They also learned of the oneness of all creation. In the eyes of God, he sees our immortal souls, not our sex. Remember, Love is our life purpose, no matter what. Yours with love, Dom, Nigeria. I understand the homophobia you are experiencing. My best advice to you is to move away from your family while still keeping in touch with them. This would help you understand and love yourself the more. You would also come to find peace within yourself. Dont hate your siblings. Love them still. They would understand someday. Remain calm and confident in yourself. Staying in a homophobic environment can be psychologically destructive to we gay people. Am gay too and have not told anyone yet. My coming out is going to be a difficult one though i dont plan to do so now. My country, Nigeria, is strongly homophobic. Dont hate yourself because Jesus Christ would never discriminate. The immense Love that God and Jesus Christ has for each of us is so indescribable that the human brain cannot apprehend. Also,
several gay persons have died and come back to life and reported their near death experiences of meeting God and/or Jesus Christ who love them no matter what! (All creation inclusive). In fact the LOVE was so great that they didnt want to return. But they had to. They also learned of the oneness of all creation. In the eyes of God, he sees our immortal souls, not our sex. Remember, Love is our life purpose, no matter what.
Yours with love, Dom,
Nigeria.

]]>