Comments on: But I’m Not Butch? http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/but-im-not-butch Help For Parents Of Gay Children Tue, 24 Apr 2012 17:36:49 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Prizm http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/but-im-not-butch/comment-page-1#comment-67797 Prizm Sat, 31 Dec 2011 19:13:16 +0000 http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/but-im-not-butch#comment-67797 I'm 34 years old... I could say I'm a lesbian but then that wouldn't be totally true since I do find some men attractive. It would be like someone asking, "Which do you prefer, Vanilla or chocolate?" I LOVE vanilla but I like chocolate too... and sometimes strawberry and butter pecan, blah, blah, blah, I could go on and on. What I'm trying to get across is sexuality isn't set in stone, it isn't one or the other. I often ask straight people, "Is it a choice that you are attracted to the opposite sex?" Think about it! And as far as being masculine=Lesbian, not true there are plenty of women that are very femme like my partner of 10 years and women like me that are very androgynous (masculine and femme at the same time) and some women that are so masculine you would think that it's a man. There are guys who look totally straight but are attracted to men...you'd never know. And then there are guys that are so femme that they could actually pass for a woman. I live in the bible belt and I've been fortunate to make friends easily and not have any problems with ignorance and/or violence. No hate crimes here :0) I hope some of what I wrote helps. If you have questions for me, feel free to ask. P.S. We do have children, my partner was married 3 times and had 4 girls... I have never had any of my own but I have been here to raise the youngest since she was a year old...she is 11. I’m 34 years old… I could say I’m a lesbian but then that wouldn’t be totally true since I do find some men attractive. It would be like someone asking, “Which do you prefer, Vanilla or chocolate?” I LOVE vanilla but I like chocolate too… and sometimes strawberry and butter pecan, blah, blah, blah, I could go on and on. What I’m trying to get across is sexuality isn’t set in stone, it isn’t one or the other. I often ask straight people, “Is it a choice that you are attracted to the opposite sex?” Think about it! And as far as being masculine=Lesbian, not true there are plenty of women that are very femme like my partner of 10 years and women like me that are very androgynous (masculine and femme at the same time) and some women that are so masculine you would think that it’s a man. There are guys who look totally straight but are attracted to men…you’d never know. And then there are guys that are so femme that they could actually pass for a woman. I live in the bible belt and I’ve been fortunate to make friends easily and not have any problems with ignorance and/or violence. No hate crimes here :0) I hope some of what I wrote helps. If you have questions for me, feel free to ask. P.S. We do have children, my partner was married 3 times and had 4 girls… I have never had any of my own but I have been here to raise the youngest since she was a year old…she is 11.

]]> By: rories http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/but-im-not-butch/comment-page-1#comment-4145 rories Mon, 28 Sep 2009 16:19:29 +0000 http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/but-im-not-butch#comment-4145 thank you!! i am 14 years old and would never attempt sports to save my life. I love being a girl and being feminine.But i am a lesbian and like other girls. And no, 12 is not too young to know. I did not come out to myself until about six mos ago, however i had my first experience with girls at 12. 12 is young but not too young. I am still a closet case and it is mind sets like that that keep me in the closet. thank you!! i am 14 years old and would never attempt sports to save my life. I love being a girl and being feminine.But i am a lesbian and like other girls. And no, 12 is not too young to know. I did not come out to myself until about six mos ago, however i had my first experience with girls at 12. 12 is young but not too young. I am still a closet case and it is mind sets like that that keep me in the closet.

]]> By: Chris http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/but-im-not-butch/comment-page-1#comment-1635 Chris Fri, 07 Nov 2008 17:41:14 +0000 http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/but-im-not-butch#comment-1635 My daughter is 12 years old and an artist. Can she really know that she is gay at 12? I know that she has a lot of contacts on the art site that she draws on that say that being gay is cool. Isn't 12 too young to know? My daughter is 12 years old and an artist. Can she really know that she is gay at 12? I know that she has a lot of contacts on the art site that she draws on that say that being gay is cool. Isn’t 12 too young to know?

]]> By: Tay http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/but-im-not-butch/comment-page-1#comment-934 Tay Tue, 12 Aug 2008 14:40:34 +0000 http://gayfamilysupport.com/blog/but-im-not-butch#comment-934 I know what you mean! I'm 16 years old, and I just came out to my parents about...oh, I guess four months ago. So far, so good. What's frustrating for me is that I look, sound, and act straight. Nothing is going to change that. Even my closest friends were surprised when I told them that I was lesbian, because I physically don't fit in with ANY of the lesbian stereotypes. I'm much too feminine to ever be considered butch, yet I don't think I'm feminine enough to fall under the category of "lipstick lesbian". It occured to me for the first time, after looking good and hard at myself, that sometimes being gay doesn't have to show. The only sure thing about somebody who identifies as gay is that they prefer their own gender. It really has nothing to do with how they act or look or speak or whatever. I'm so glad that somebody else (and hopefully many others) have reached the same conclusion as me! I know what you mean!

I’m 16 years old, and I just came out to my parents about…oh, I guess four months ago. So far, so good.

What’s frustrating for me is that I look, sound, and act straight. Nothing is going to change that. Even my closest friends were surprised when I told them that I was lesbian, because I physically don’t fit in with ANY of the lesbian stereotypes. I’m much too feminine to ever be considered butch, yet I don’t think I’m feminine enough to fall under the category of “lipstick lesbian”.

It occured to me for the first time, after looking good and hard at myself, that sometimes being gay doesn’t have to show. The only sure thing about somebody who identifies as gay is that they prefer their own gender. It really has nothing to do with how they act or look or speak or whatever.

I’m so glad that somebody else (and hopefully many others) have reached the same conclusion as me!

]]>