A Gay Boys Advice To Parents
Hello,My name’s Daniel
I live in Bulgaria(Europe) with my mother,little brother and grandmother..My dad works in another town(thank god)…. My mum has a hard time because dad doesn’t send money and her job pays bad…and she doesn’t need more troubles with finding out….about me….anyways…she has enough problems with me and thats why i am concerned and have a “short fuse” with anybody and…in short i changed 4 schools in 1 season and my grades are very low…but you probably want a story…
well i cannot tell you a masterpiece i can just tell you how the view of the world is through the eyes a 15 years old,teenage homosexual boy…well i’ll just get to the point…it is very hard..because not many boys share his…interests…and he is feeling alone and isolated…even with his parents support he is alone…he cannot tell other people even if he wants it very much because most people doesn’t understand difference and will probably make fun of him and even sometimes it gets to violence…
any parent knowing of his son orientation should make his life be more comfortable…i mean…make him feel normal…not just saying “i understand you and etc.”…you should make him happy…maybe go out somewhere where he wants from a long time…or suggest camping with a neighbourhood family which has a son his age…he will be pleased trust me!
But no way,in no condition do not have a conversation with him about homosexual people..it will just upset him.It’s simple..homosexual people have more in touch with their emotional side…if you say “you are an idiot,i don’t know why i let you live here(or something from this sort)” he will be very upset although he doesn’t show it…he will probably lock up in his room and be devastated,sometimes even cry.
You see his interests until the age of 15 are simple…just to talk with another boy but to be most open…to tell his feelings and what are his desires and etc..when he reaches the age of 14-15 (puberty) of course he would want to have some physical contact with a person from the same sex…maybe a kiss or to touch his face,chest and some other body parts.of course of the age of 15-16 he will have some sexual desires but gay boys that age are too afraid to have intimate relations with another boy…on the ago of 16-17 he is more willing and can control his body and acts like a normal boy and you can hardly notice he is homosexual..on the age of 18 and above his only intimate wish is to have a night alone with a boy..what they will do is a secret(i’m not that old LOL)…
A homosexual boy accepts everything with ease,because he understants difference.mostly they feel miserable until they find their “buddy”.
Also you should look for their relationship with their brother/sister..just because they are gay doesn’t mean their relations should be TRASH…try to keep the warm 
..make family dinners or send them to both to do a “important job” or sent them to camping…their relations are very important because he is a child after all and he cannot share everything with elders…he needs someone his age that way he feels more…understood…well i have to go now training is calling..hope you read and reply…
Regards,Daniel
Bulgaria,Europe
PS:Sorry for the bad spelling and punctuation my formal language is Bulgarian…
I feel like I can relate to this. Ever since I was a little boy I like to play with make up and play with girls. All my friends in the orphanage were mostly girls. Some boys were mean to me. I had a really close girl friend, named Katya. When I got adopted, my parents suspected that I would probably be gay. I was too young to understand. In fifth grade through middle school I was picked because I was so weak and sensitive, and I wasn’t what they expected of me. To make the long story short, I started having crushes on guys my freshmen year of high school. I came out to my friends. They accepted me. That summer my mom found out I was gay. She kept asking me so many questions, and even harrassed me. I am a sophomore now, almost a junior. This year I wore lip gloss at school, to make me feel comfortable. I came home with nail polish on my fingers one day from school and my mom got angry. I know I am very flamboyant and feminine, but I can’t help it. My mom tells me what to do. She makes fun of me. She tells me to keep my hands down. It’s hard not to. She won’t accept me, neither will my dad. I cry a lot. Sometimes I cry myself to sleep. ” Mom, why won’t you just accept me?” Please help me.
Hi I am a parent of a 14year old boy that I have noticed that he tends to look at boys more than girls and he has more girls as friends then boys at one point he stated that he liked boys and that he was confused and now he says he is strait but i dont believe that . when I read you note you made me cry because I find my self being mean to my son at time I am so sorry I am crying for help
A Sad parent
HI CLAUDIA
i should say that boys’ looking to other boys may have different meanings.. sometimes because of having sexual interest (as u guess ur boy is not heterosexual, he s homosexual or bisexual)
but sometimes thhey may look in other meanings,, boys or girls may be jelous about his/her friend, if they have a spesification that he/she wants to have on his/her own body or own life!!!
in these teen ages there r many meanings of that lookings i think, but if u communication is good with ur son, u should state MORE OPENLY and honestly that u love ur son as he is, even he s gay!!!
may be he said first that he liked boys but then choosed to hide that he s gay because of having a doubt that u may have a bad reaction
(this s a very important point for son ,
we many times imagine or think about HOW A REACTION WOULD MY MOM/DAD/SISTER/BROTHER/FAMILY/FRIENDS GIVE IF I SAY HIM/HER/THEM THAT I M GAY/BISEXUAL…)
THIS IS A VERY IMPORTANT POINT FOR US!!
hi DANIEL!
i m 21 years old boy and
i couldnt stop myself saying that YOU ARE VERY LUCKY BECAUSE YOU HAVE A VERY GOOD LOGIC, THINKS … (i dont know whats the true thing here to say, i hope u understand me, my first language is NOT english eighter)…
shortly you are in a very good situation in your very YOUNG AGE… it s a very good luck! please appreciate!
loves my friend!
I dont know what to do my 14 year old son just told me he was gay. He has always got picked on at school being called gay and faggot. I am so worried about him. He always says he will kill himself. He can be overly dramatic but i am so worried. He has no friends at all and wont talk to me. He says he is gay and has always known it . PLEASE help me im lost
Hi Daniel, I am a parent of 2 boys. One is 17 and the other is 12. My 17 year old just told me he is gay. He told me he knew since he was in the 6th grade. i never knew. He dont want me to tell ANYONE. I will respect his wish. I love him just the same. he means everything to me. Now what i want to talk to you about is i have alot of questions and he does not want to talk about the gay subject at all. I am very open and feel like i should talk to him in a positve way but he told me im insensitive. Here i thought i was being helpful. Im so confused because i want to let him know i will take him to “gay areas” to be with teens like himself or i just want to talk to him because i know the road might be hard because society can be hard on gay people and i want to be there for him. He is #1 in his high school as far as academics. He has been accepted to a college and he will start in the fall of 09. the college has a gay,lesbian, transgender club and i told him and i told him they also have a website. He freaked out because i mentioned the subject.
ok, here it goes i am going through puberty right now and i have a problem and i dont know what do do. i am a 14 year old boy and i think im gay. i get “excited” when i see another boy. this is not like that with girls i have a best friend and we were in my living room, and i noticed that he had an erection and he saw that i noticed it and covered it up do you think this is the same way for him ? is this normal for me ? i need help i have had girl friends but i wasn’t that interested. and i dont know how to tell this to my family if i am gay i think that this boy is really cute and i just want to cuddle and i picturing doing things with him. i get really really excited when hes at my house but i dont know if HE knows. we have had sleep overs and he always insists in sleeping in my bed me and him. and its a twin bed but when i go to his house I sleep on the floor and he has a queen bed. would he be doing this because of his parents.? how would i find out if he has the same feelings as me. do i get really close to kiss and if he doesnt go for it does that mean hes not and should we do this when we are having our sleep overs when we are at his house and his parents are not home he sits really close to me on the couch. i REALLY REALLY need help im so confused and i dont know what to do if you can help me please email me at cardencash@yahoo.com
Hi SARAH
Firstly 14 years old boy is in very crazy ages, that years old person may do everythng, we all know this
and if u are gay there r much harder sides of life…
Firstly, having no friends is a very disadvantage!!!
Friend (a good one) is very good to share ur feelings and to have a heart to heart talk with him!!!
I have very good friends and now (now I am 21) I realize that I passed many hard times with big supports of my friends (we all supported each other 3-5 friends)
So if u can supply him a friend who shares the same feelings with him, it d be so helpful!! or just show the way to find that friend!
YOU TOLD:
He said to you he is gay and he has known this already at all!!!
but he doesnt want to talk with you????
WHY???
He told u he is gay and u say YOU SUPPORT HIM, why he doesnt talk with u more?
you act him as a best friend!!
a mom also best friend thats very good!
I think A FRIEND SHOULD SHOW HIM he is in a very good situation!
(For example if I were his friend, I would talk with him long and long times, and I would tell him, YOU R VERY LUCKY HAVING THAT MOM, IF I WERE YOU I D BE ALSO BEST FRIEND OF THIS MOM !!!
May be he just need that good friend TO CHAT also TO REMIND HIM about HIS WELL SITUATION
then he will never think to kill himself again!!!
I wish we were in the same country:))
because I always am surprised about youngs in a very good situation but dont realize the worth of their situation, I always am surprise about them and I always tell them and make them realize their well situation:))
I hope it s helpful a bit for u
If you wanna writing with me you can send me e mail:
sil_bastan_87@hotmail.com
I HOPE THE BEST FOR UR SON!!!
It amazes me when parents refuse to except their children for who they are!!!! I have two sons, one is as boy as a boy can be, my younger son is as gay as it gets. He is young, and has already told me that he is gay. My husband and I encourage our children to be exactly who they are!! These parents (especially the moms) who are so hateful to thier gay sons disgusts me in every way!! What is wrong with these small minded people???
I can totally relate to you regarding how your son is shutting you out when you are willing to accept him gay or straigt. I am going though the same thing with my son and it’s hurtful. I realized that these new feelings are confusing to him and he’s trying to accept himself let alone having to worry about making us comfortable. I’ve decided to back off and just let him be. I figure I’ve reminded him of my unconditional love and I’ve told him I’m here for him when and if he’s ready with whatever he needs from me. That’s all we can really do. Believe me I know it’s tough I’m struggling with it everyday. I just want him to let me in so I can help him through anything!
Hi to everyone
well, coincidence or not I’m 15 , I’m gay and I’m also from Bulgaria I know what it’s like to be different and only a few friends and my brother know that I’m gay … but for instance if I tel my father I’m not she f he will want me to be his son anymore…
I just don’t get it I would understand it if people don’t like gays because they act like small girls , and all female type like Azis ( a strange person similar to MJ ) but mot gay kids or gays at all aren’t like that … I know quite a few people who have known me for more than 10 years and they don’t notice a thing… I mean I’m completely normal he only slight difference is that I like boys not girls … what’s so wrong with that…
you can email me at fugazith@abv.bg if you want to chat …
hi im adam and i came out i was gay 2 months ago my mom accepts me a little but my dad divorced my mom 1 yr ago and says he will send me to boot camp if i dont start coming to my senses i just turned 15 and im bout 2 go 2 my 2nd year in high school my dad is doing everything he can and wont even talk 2 me no more 2 days ago i told my dad he couldnt change me and i have a boyfriend named shaun i wish would except me for who i am
hi i am kile and my boyfriend reese needs help he said he wont come out the closet because his dad makes fun of gay people all the time and we’ve been going out 4 a year i am 16 and he needs help what should i do
email me at
midnight_masacre@yahoo.com to help
atleast you have the support of you family.
I am a 15 year old homosexual boy and I live with my mother step dad and a younger and older sister. I told them about me 8 months ago. and I live with the fact that she can not accept me. it hurts. it truly hurts. I love her. and for her to just turn her head. it hurts. but one day. I will leave here. this place. and find someone who truly loves me. and I will not hold back because of what she has done to me. and I will give everything I have to that man I feel in live with.
You can lean on me for advice.
Hello: I have a 15 year old son who came out in 7th grade. We always knew from the time he was around 3. You may say how did you know this? Well, he always liked dresses, pretty ponies, the color pink and for about a year insisted that he was a girl. We tried to balance, provided some form of “boy” toys like trucks and Barbies. But he had a real preference for the Barbie.
Since he came out he has had several obstacles. He thought it would be easier because people were always asking why he had so many girlfriends and he thought he would clear this up. Lately, he has had sucidal thoughts, taken up smoking pot, was busted last year for possession, and is feeling very isolated. He is a well liked, popular boy at school but feels very alone. His dad is very accepting of him and loves him very much as I do. Any body out there with a similar situation?
im 15 and bi yr 11. I came out to my two closest friend (Girls). They had said that they were waiting for me to say that. Now they treat me bit diffrent (askin if i wanna hang around with them outside of sch ect). I have always been bullied because people think im gay. Someone at sch overheard me talking and have threatened me that they will tell people if i dont do what they say. I have though Suicidal Thoughts. Im worried bout sch as im only out to close friends what should i do mail me doddlefox@msn.com
Hey, I’m a junior in high school, and am haveing complications with my sexuality. In recent months, I’ve grown very accepting of myself (mostly because of a guy at high school and no nothing happened.), and I’ve come out to quite a few people now. However, I’m finding it rather hard to come out to my parents, because my father is a god fearing, song leader/sunday school leader at my church, and my mother is in my opinion unaware of her hypocratic behaviors toward others. I’m very worried that I will be disowned and am trying to prepare a “cushion” to land on if, and when I tell them. If anyone has anything that can help me with my situation, that would be much appreciated.
A worried son
___________________
“It doesn’t make them bad people, it just mkes them teens and pree-teens” -Judge Judy-
hi im 16 and i’ve been bisexual all my life… seriosly most people say they notice they are gay/bi when they are in their teen years, well i’ve been bisexual for a very long time. if you want to talk to me about what to do or how you should feel when it comes to people teasing you saying “haha your gay…fag..” and “go away faggot” please, please email me at Azelias@live.com or gostkilla93@yahoo.com or (lol) gostkilla93@gmail.com and if non of these work please use youtube.com/kira4ever123 just dont leave a message on my comments no one there knows im bisexual.
i have a hard time trying to tell my parents that im bisexual. my moms like this really high up important person at the town hall and my step fathers this heavy punk rocker. my brothers are seriosly “special” (anger issues,ages 7 and 11) i have to go to cuonseling three times a week just because my family treats me like im a slave. but thats not the half of it… i try so hard to find boys that will go out with me but dispite my greatest efforts no one will…I wish i had more firends…ever since i told them i’ve been shunned away and i cant even walk to my locker anymore… i saw sme guys horsing around and as soon as i walked up they said “faggot” and everyone stopped and gave me that stupid stink eye. im kinda isolated at the mommunt trying to get into a foster home or something… but its really hard when people tell me my family loves me (even though they never ever treat me like it)…i dont wanna take up to much space now so please email me sometime any time…ok this may sound loserish but if you play runescape (online roll playing game instant message me there as a friend Gostkilla93 thats my user name if im offline i’m not playing! lol
please, please email me… if i learn to trust you and your not just some 40yr old guy trying to rape me i’ll email you my phone number
im 15 and im gay. all i ever hear is bla bla bla about im a gay kid and my family shunned me and i constantly get teased and made fun of and so on but if thats the case then im sorry to say this blantently but stop being a big pussy (no offfense to girls). if someone is making fun of you kick thier ass or teach them a lesson. your still a human being and deserve respect. if all you do is walk around feeling sorry for yourself then hell to the yeah your gonna get made fun of but if you straight up tell the person thats making fun of you back the fuck up then chances are a)you will get picked on less b)you will get some friends who respect you and stand up for you. about your unaccepting parents thats probably easier to deal with than dealing with people who pick on you. if your parents ignore you because you told them your gay or if they r in denial then what you have to do is get in their face ( literaly) and tell them that if they dont stop playing their 3 year old bullshit games that they will lose you forever. you need to make them understand that you r who you r and you will not take shit from anyone not even your own parents. if they want to completely take you out of the family or disown you then force your way into thier lives and make them realize that they r horrible parents who dont deserve children. and finally if you have told your parents that your gay and now you feel that they r trying to invade your life ,they arent. they want to know more about you so they can understand you and help you and protect you because you may think that youre invincible but youre not. if your parents constantly adk you questions then answer them all and answer them truthfully just lay it all out on the table and let whatever is left take its course